Who would ever choose us……………
After having healed from the emotional pain of infertility, my husband and I decided to pursue adoption. We were given the name of Geri’s adoption agency by more than one person, so we decided to call and find out about it ourselves. We met with Geri and spent a couple of hours with her. We were both very comfortable with her and very impressed by her and by what she had accomplished over the years. We were put on a wait list for the application process, and a few months later we got the go-ahead to start our application. A few months after that, we were in the final stages of the process and were in classes with other couples, all of whom were quite a bit younger than we were (we were in our early 40s). I worried out loud to Geri at one point that we were “too old” and no birthparents would ever choose us. She was wonderfully reassuring and stated that we were just what birthparents were looking for – a committed, stable couple who could offer a stable, established home to a child.
After a few months went by and all of our classmates had been chosen by birthparents, I started telling myself that we were not going to be picked by anyone. I went out of town for a short weekend trip, and the night before I was to come back home, my husband called and said, “Geri called.” At first I was a bit confused (as a friend of ours is Jerry and I thought for some reason he had called but couldn’t imagine why). It finally dawned on me, after my husband started explaining, that it was “THE CALL.” We had indeed been picked! Our future birthmother wanted to talk to us right away, even though we would be meeting within the next few days, so even though it was an unusual request from a birthmom, Geri ok’d it and I ended up spending over 2 ½ hours on the phone with the birthmom.
My husband and I were so nervous to meet her, yet so excited too! We spent another couple of hours talking with her, her boyfriend, and her year old son in the restaurant where we had our first face-to-face meeting, and probably the highlight of my night was when she asked if I wanted to feel her belly (she was 7 months pregnant at the time). I was blessed to be able to feel the head of my future daughter and was nearly overcome with emotion. The next couple of months were a flurry of activity for us, getting our daughter’s room ready, plus talking and texting with our birthmom. The day finally came for the birth, and at our birthmom’s request, we arrived there a few hours after she was born. She wanted to have some time alone with her/our daughter before we got there. We paced all morning long, nothing but nervous energy as we waited for the go-ahead to come to the hospital.
Once there, we were so excited to hold this new little life, but so uncertain as well. Not just uncertainty about how to hold a baby just a few hours old, but also uncertainty about how the birthmom would feel about us holding her, knowing that we would be taking her home instead of the birthmom. All through the process, though, our birthmom, young though she was, was so incredibly mature. Once she made the decision to make an adoption plan for her daughter, she was completely committed to that route. Even in the restaurant as she was offering for me to touch her belly, she said, “It’s ok – after all, you’re her mom!” That statement just blew me away. As we all were leaving the hospital, the birthmom and I waited in the lobby for the guys to bring the cars around, and it finally started to hit us. We were both sobbing, and I kept asking her if she was going to be ok. She kept saying yes, that this was the right thing to do for her daughter. Promises of visits helped both of us say goodbye at the hospital, but I still cried all the way home. For me it was grieving for our birthmom who was releasing her daughter into our care. We saw her a week later as they came to our house for a visit, bringing breast milk that she had pumped for her daughter. We saw each other quite often over the next several weeks as she continued to pump for us. What a blessing that was, and I can only imagine the sacrifice it was for her. All throughout the process, though, she was adamant about doing the best things for her daughter. She wanted to give this precious little girl the best start in life that she could, and she continues to amaze me even after all this time. I thank God for her maturity and for allowing us to grow our family in this way.
I know that all the counseling that Geri did with her also helped prepare her for the many overwhelming emotions that she was likely to face. Our birthmom bonded well with Geri, who is a pillar of strength and a wealth of knowledge for all participants in the adoption process.
We continue to see our birthmom as well as talk and text with her, and we truly have a good relationship with her. We share pictures over FaceBook so she can see her daughter when we aren’t able to visit frequently. Our daughter will grow up knowing her biological siblings (she now has a biological half-sister, too, along with her brother), for which I am so grateful. There was a time in my life (before meeting Geri) when I was very leery of open adoption, but I now see it for the blessing it is for all of us. It has been an amazing journey, and through it all I credit Geri and her agency for preparing all of us in the adoption process.
Adoptions by Heart
4605 S. Yosemite St.
Denver CO. 80237
*Disclaimer – Photos and testimonials may be from both present and previous clients of employment of Geri Glazer and Jeanne Reisig.