An Open Adoption
Some twenty-plus years ago, my family and I went to a park on a beautiful Friday afternoon. It was a great day to enjoy the outside, but this was for a meeting.
We, my wife and I and our seven year old son, were going to the park for a gathering with some special people. We were joining Geri, the Executive Director of our adoption agency, Babette, a lovely, nineteen year old girl and Babette’s new baby boy. The little boy was to come home with us.
That experience comes back to me, in my minds’ eye, in the form of snapshots, images from that hour, that provide the point of transition in our collective life from before Jake, to after Jake. I see the flowering trees and the greenery of the park. There are tears streaming down to meet smiles on most faces. There are brave and loving words being exchanged. My seven year old is holding this newborn stranger, with pride and serious question crossing his face. There is me, looking down and seeing this tiny little guy, and I’m scared, because I don’t feel anything for him. Zip, nada, nothing.
The worry didn’t last long though, because soon I remembered, that this had been my same experience, in a hospital seven years before. I remembered holding a baby and being scared witless, because I didn’t have a warm emotion to be found. That had changed profoundly in the following weeks. A miracle occurred, and my heart blossomed and I had feelings I had never before known.
Truth be told, as I stood in the park, I wondered if there was anyway that this situation with adoption could possibly be the same? Can I feel for this little squeaky guy, that which I feel for my biological child?
Luckily miracles are not like lightning. They can strike twice.
My son’s have each gone off to college, stepping out into their emerging lives. Now, the times that we are all together at the same time, are more rare and special. So often, I look at the two of them, and marvel at who they are, what they each mean to me, and how great my love is, for each of them in measures that have no distinction.
Our adoption was open. Jakes first-mom is part of our lives, and she has been an instrumental advisor, friend and source of love to our son.
We are blessed.
My life would have
Adoptions by Heart
4605 S. Yosemite St.
Denver CO. 80237
*Disclaimer – Photos and testimonials may be from both present and previous clients of employment of Geri Glazer and Jeanne Reisig.